‘My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding’ on TLC




So much bling, so little substance.


“My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding,” which makes its debut on Sunday on TLC, seems intent on showing that American Gypsies have nothing on their minds but lavish weddings and parties and laughably excessive dresses to wear to them. That’s presumably a stereotype, but TLC — remember when that stood for The Learning Channel? — is hardly a place to turn to for serious enlightenment. It’s a place to turn to for sideshows, and this new reality series is certainly that.


The show, patterned after a popular British series of the same title but without the “American,” does for American Gypsies what “Jerseylicious” and its ilk do for New Jerseyans: namely, suggest that they’re all proudly shallow and retrograde.


“Gypsy girls are so demanding,” Sondra Celli, a dressmaker, says in Episode 1, as she makes a preposterous wedding dress for a 17-year-old named Shyanne. “They want the biggest, the biggest, the biggest dress they can get, with the most bling, bling, bling. I don’t know how we’re going to get her down the aisle.”


Much is made of mating rituals, in which teenage virgin brides (“The first kiss should be in front of the altar,” Shyanne’s mother says) are married off to men they barely know. The guys, for their part, tend to talk about women as if they were cars. “I want something new; I don’t want something used,” Shyanne’s fiancé, an 18-year-old named Michael, says in reference to his future bride’s inexperience with men.


The young lovelies put more thought into their dresses than they put into their prospective mates or impending marriages. Their tastes, though, tend to run to the gaudy and vulgar, something that, incongruously, is encouraged by their virginity-guarding parents.


Take Pat, for instance, who in Episode 2 is planning a lavish Halloween party where his 14-year-old, Priscilla, will be dangled in front of possible husbands like meat. She is having two outfits made, one a fluffy gown, the other — to be worn later, for dancing — quite a bit skimpier.


“You look like a star, Darling,” he tells the child when she tries Outfit 2 on. What she actually looks like is something you’d see in a strip club.


From the early episodes, it appears that no effort is going to be made to address the disturbing questions you may have after watching this stuff. (Do these child marriages last? Is domestic violence a problem in this culture?) This isn’t a sociological study; there’s nothing respectful about the way the people here are portrayed.


Yet it’s not fun to watch, either: it’s too late in the life cycle of these shows to draw amusement from gawking for gawking’s sake. So “My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding” ends up as just more wearying proof that there is apparently no ethnic group, religion, closed community or other subculture that isn’t willing to make a spectacle of itself on reality television.


My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding


TLC, Sunday nights at 10, Eastern and Pacific times; 9, Central time.


Produced for TLC by Firecracker Films.